DH and I have noticed a crack in the ceiling in the kitchen. It has been slowly getting worse. There is a bathroom, more specifically a bathtub directly above the crack, so we have tried ignoring the crack to see if it would miraculously disappear. Yesterday we had another plumbing problem so DH decided it was time to overcome active denial and consent to exploratory surgery on the ceiling. Ian, the plumber is a very friendly man who obviously enjoys the challenge of finding the source of a leak, with zest and devotion akin to Livingstone searching for the source of the Nile. Armed with equal amounts of passion and skill, Ian wielded a sheetrock knife and a flashlight and began his quest. His search turned up several potential problems but unconvinced that he had found the real problem, he followed the trail of clues up to the attic (forensic plumbing). When he poured water into a pipe draining the condensing tray of the air conditioning unit and the water poured out of the ceiling in the kitchen, he was ecstatic! I was screaming “stop” stop” and he was yelling “wow! this is great!”
While searching for the source of the Nile in our attic, Ian discovered another river. The plywood around the chimney is soaked. This is bad, this is a big bad river because it may mean we need a new roof. Or new siding. Or both. So DH and I will both put on our lifejackets as we start to navigate this new big bad river.
In the meantime, we are considering cutting additional holes into the ceiling in various locations in our center hall colonial home, and then covering them with plexiglass instead of boring old sheetrock. Then we could charge admission, to view the see-through house. Haven’t you ever wondered what the guts of your home look like, its digestive, circulatory, respiratory and nervous systems? Want to see all the things that can go wrong in a house? Yes, we can provide a live view into the mouth (actually the ceiling) of the Money Pit.
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