I'm Walking

I can't run, but I've been trying to do some good old fashioned walking. Given the choice: outdoors or the gym, I will take the outdoors option every single time. I am willing to put on extra layers and navigate sections of snow covered trails to avoid the gym. I have been exploring the the options close to home, and Teatown is becoming one of my favorite walking/hiking destinations. The loop around the lake is 1.5 miles, and totally flat, perfect for a "quickie." But there are many miles of trails with hills aplenty. I always bring tunes and I often bring a camera.

Today was one of those early spring days that felt more like winter than spring. It was more cloudy than sunny and windy too. Temps into the low 40s. I walked along the lake and then took one of the trails that climbs fairly steeply then descends back down to the lake. I set my music to "shuffle" and spent about 90 minutes breathing in the cool fresh air and contemplating the colors of winter. I moved slowly through the snow covered sections to decrease the chances of slipping or falling. I watched the swans sticking their heads in the water to find food. I saw a few other people, but most of the time I had only myself to keep me company.

I came home, made myself a cup of tea, and then started to do the things I needed to get done. A very peaceful day.

Road Trip

I work for the State University of New York, and several times a year I get to travel to various campuses within the State University system. Tomorrow I am going to Delhi. This is the perfect road trip. It is probably under 3 hours and most of it is on easy roads. I don’t have to be there until 2 pm, so I have time to go to the gym before heading out. Then I can load the CD player and set the cruise control. When I get to Delhi, maybe I will find a funky little lunch emporium (then again, it is more likely that Delhi is devoid of anything even remotely funky). After the meeting and a friendly dinner, I get to hang out in a hotel room and read, write, or watch TV. And then….. if I may quote my friend Lynn, “the best part of going to these meetings is you get to sleep for 8 hours in a bed all by yourself.” As much as I love DH and sons #1 and #2, I must admit that sometimes I enjoy being by myself. In small doses, of course. For 2 days, there is no dishwasher to empty, or laundry to be folded, or daily reminders of the chores I neglect. I get to interact with some interesting people, too, people that are so different from me. The downside-- the food is usually mediocre but abundant. Boredom often leads to mindless eating. There is usually a lousy “fitness center” in the hotel. Should I bring my sledgehammer? Or my suspension trainer? Hmmm, maybe I will bring some fitness toys on my road trip.

SLR Lust

If I was going to make a deal with myself to pack lunch to save money in order to buy myself something, this would probably be it: a digital SLR camera with a nice zoom lens. I grew up with a camera in my hands. When I was about 10 years old, my father bought me my first 35mm camera. His daughter would not be seen carrying around a Kodak Instamatic! He then packed a pad of paper and a pen in his pocket, took me to the park and taught me how to use the camera. He taught me about the relationship between shutter speed, aperture size and the depth of field. And I was on my way. He always had different cameras and he made sure I always had one. Before I went to college, he gave me an Argus C3.

He even repaired the soft brown leather case that was falling apart, by sewing all the seams with white dental floss. For the next 9 years, I took hundreds of photos with that camera. I loved that camera despite its one shortcoming—it didn’t have a light meter. I had to consider the film speed and then manually set both the shutter speed and the f-stop. It was a range finder, so focusing involved aligning the split image. Then I would hope I got everything right. Most of the time I did, but I knew I wanted an automatic SLR camera. When I graduated and got my first job, I was living at home and had very few expenses. When I got my first paycheck, I bought a camera—an Olympus OM10. I still own it, but I haven’t used it since I got my first digital camera. Several years later, I bought another Olympus camera—the XA. That 35 mm camera fit in my pocket and was my companion on so many bike trips! Once I entered the realm of digital photography, I opted for the pocket camera first. I love my little Canon and it is surprisingly versatile. I take it with my whenever I am hiking or biking, and I even take it out just to go take some pictures. This is when I start wishing I had the SLR. There have been times when I have come close to buying it. There are reasonably priced models specifically for the “hobbyist” but I just haven’t made the commitment. I keep telling myself it is something I want not something I need. Is it my cheapstreak talking or am I just too damn practical!

Lunch Math

More often than not, I bring my lunch to work. I keep telling myself that the reason I do this is to make sure I eat a balanced healthy meal. By brown-bagging, I am not tempted to overeat, or make poor choices, such as French fries, cookies or Snapple Iced Tea. It also makes it much easier to spread the food out. I can have part of my lunch before high noon, and then finish it later in the afternoon. This works well on days that I go to the gym, so I am not absolutely starving when I am just starting my workout. Then of course there is the politically correct/green rationalization. By bringing lunch, I am consuming fewer resources (by avoiding the packaging associated with take-out) and probably wasting less food (by packing leftovers instead of tossing them after they sit in the frig for several days).

Over the last week or two, I have come to the realization that there is another reason that I bring my lunch. I am cheap. I could have said frugal or economical or some other euphemism for cheap. But the plain truth is I do have a streak of cheap, and every time I buy lunch in midtown Manhattan I suffer from sticker shock. Now there is no shortage of lunchtime dining choices within a half block radius of my office front door. And many of them do offer healthy and delicious choices. There’s Hale and Hearty, serving soups and salads. And Chipoltle with their delicious burritos (an example of overeating: the burritos are BIG and I always eat the whole thing). But lunch costs at least $7, and usually $8 or $9. If I did this 4 days a week (I work 4 days/week, not 5), then that’s at least $30 a week, or $120 a month! or about $1400 a year!! Okay, so the lunch I pack is not free, but it certainly costs much less. Let’s say a brown bag lunch costs $2, and I do that 3 days a week, then I am saving at least $16 a week, or $64 a month, or at least $700 a year. And whenever I pack my lunch, DH gets a lunch too, so between the 2 of us, that’s $1400 a year.

I am hereby initiating Project Cheap Streak (PCS). I am going to use my cheap streak to encourage the adoption of healthy habits and brown bagging, by investigating what I could buy for myself for $700 (PCS7) or for my family for $1400 (PCS14). This could be interesting because I am not a material girl. I don’t usually go for expensive clothes or jewelry or make-up. But I’m sure I can think of ways to spend that kind of money. That doesn’t mean I am going to buy any of these things as a reward for packing lunch 3 days a week for the next year. It’s just a way to motivate me by thinking about the money as well as the good healthy food I will be eating.

Tales of the Medicine Ball

I made a medicine ball. There are some old soccer balls in the garage. I invested $5 in a 50 pound bag of sand. I cut a small V into a #4 soccer ball with an exacto knife, stuck a kitchen funnel in the resultant hole and filled the ball with sand. This actually took a long time because the sand wasn’t completely dry so it didn’t flow right down the funnel. I had to use a chopstick to coax and push the sand into the ball. Then I patched the hole using a standard bike tube patch kit and wrapped some duct tape around the ball passing over the patch. When I picked up the ball, my first impression was, “damn this thing is heavy.” It weighs in at 11.5 pounds!!! That’s about double what I was hoping for. I’m sure I will find ways to use it and torture myself, but I am already thinking of ways to make a lighter medicine ball. Buy one? what fun is that! I have a smaller soccer ball, and I was thinking of using rice instead of sand, or maybe lentils (I’m not kidding, lentils may be less dense than rice and sloshing lentils might give it a nice sound), but how do you get lentils down a funnel (ANS: get a bigger funnel).

Yesterday was an indoor workout day and I made sure I included various medicine ball play (4 or 6 pounders). I watched a whole bunch of videos on youtube and I spent 15 or 20 minutes doing a bunch of different exercises and movements, whatever I remembered and seemed to be working, nothing specific. It was actually fun to “go with the flow” instead of doing 10 of this and 12 of that. As a result, I am a little bit sore today in a lot of different places, including my abs and other small muscles all around my core.

In the meantime I have roughly 40 pounds of sand in the garage which I can donate to a neighbor’s kid’s sandbox, but not before I make some sandbags.

Green Button Failure

I had dinner with my girlfriends to celebrate Nancy's 50th birthday. She chose a restaurant in the chichi mall. I drove up to the entrance to the parking garage and pushed the big green button to get a parking ticket. No ticket. Push big green button again, still not ticket. So I pushed the little green button on the callbox, no response. I spent the next 60 seconds pushing buttons despite it being painfully obvious that I was not going to gain entrance to the parking garage. By this time, someone had pulled up behind me, so I had to get out of my car to play charades to get this lady to back up so I could back up and choose another entrance to the parking structure. This time pushing the big green button produced a parking ticket, the bar went up and I was admitted to the inner sanctum.

After spending some quality time with my girls (good food, martinis, making fun of the waiter, etc), I found my way back to my car drove down the ramp and handed the sacred ticket to the parking attendant. When he gave me my change, he asked me a question, with a strong Jamaican accent.

I heard him ask me, "Did you have trouble parking your car?" I felt so vindicated, at last this man was acknowledging my plight, how something as simple as parking my car had made me feel so vulnerable, like a pawn in the game of life!

"As a matter of fact, I did have trouble parking my car!" I then launched into a narrative of my ordeal, with all the gory details. Arlo Guthrie would have been proud of me, even though I left out the part about the 8x10 color glossy photos with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one. When I had finished my sad story, it occurred to me to ask him, "How did you know I had trouble parking my car?"

"Lady, I asked you if you know the results of the Ohio vote!"

WTF? How did I hear "Did you have trouble parking your car" from "Do you know who won the Ohio vote?" The Jamaican parking attendant had a wonderful sense of humor and we spent the next few minutes laughing at my wacky ears. When I told him that I didn't know anything about the Ohio vote, he was appalled! "What? How can you not know about this, don't you live in America?" When I provided clarification, that I knew there was a primary and that it was do or die for Hillary, but I did not yet know the results of the "Ohio vote," he was relieved. "Good, I can accept this." I was permitted to exit the parking garage and once again live and work in America.

When I told son #2 about my encounter with the Jamaican parking attendant, he said, "Mom, he thinks you're a total suburban airhead bimbo." Well, maybe, but my theory is that the parking attendant is a federal agent of the Immigration and Naturalization Service and I passed the citizenship renewal pop quiz.

Cold Skills Including Plunging

Yesterday I went for a club ride. It was billed as a training ride for slower riders who want to improve their skills and hopefully their speed as well. The plan is to ride the same route on 4 Sundays in March, to learn to handle certain challenges with greater confidence, strength and skill. The ride was 22 miles, 11 miles up to Swan’s Deli and then back. It was cold when we started, but we were all dressed for it, and no one was complaining about being cold once we got moving. It was a beautiful day, and riding your bike when there is snow on the ground is a great experience.

The first skill we learned was how over-inflating your tires is bad. Pat got to learn how to change a flat before we even got started. In fact, she learned how to change front and rear tires before the ride was over. Then we practiced some more mundane skills, like how to navigate through several lanes of traffic safely, obeying traffic signals, downshifting and using all your gears when climbing.

When we got to Swan’s deli, we purchased some hot beverages and Jill really needed a bathroom. There is a big sign that says the bathroom is not for public use, but Jill threatened to pee on their floor, so they let her use the bathroom. Well, if Jill can use the bathroom, then so can Alan, Pat, Mable, John and finally me. When I finally got in there, I realized that the toilet was stuffed up and on the brink of flooding. And there was a plunger in the corner, suggesting that this is a common occurrence for this toilet, so wanting to a) be a good citizen and b) be able to return to Swan’s deli and use their toilet on subsequent Sundays, I engaged my plunging skills. Now I have better than average plunging skills, having practiced a considerable amount on one of the toilets at home. But alas, I was not able to unclog the toilet, so I had to tell the staff that the toilet was hopelessly clogged (but it wasn’t my fault) and that my noble attempts to dislodge the clogging wad of whatever had failed. They were not happy, so next Sunday we will have to find another venue for Jill to pee. Jill suggested that I put on my balaclava and helmet and return to the toilet and hoist the plunger again so she could take some photos. I thought this was a fantastic idea and was willing to comply, but at that point they weren’t letting us anywhere near their elite bathroom, especially since we were laughing so hard.

Just for the record, Panera's has great toilets.

Embracing Slow

When I competed in my last triathlon 21 years ago, I was slow. Since then, my biological clock has been working against me. If I believe the science (and I do), then I have lost muscle mass, my fast twitch fibers twitch with less enthusiasm, my stride has shortened, and a loss of flexibility has translated into less efficiency. As I get older, speed becomes more elusive. I can live with this. But if I accept my place in the triathlon world at the back of the pack, if my destiny is to exemplify slow, then the question becomes, why am I busting my ass in the gym 4 or 5 days a week? Glad you asked.

• I may be at the back of the pack, but I’m in the pack. How many women over 50 do you know that are training for a triathlon?
• There’s plodding gasping ugly slow and there’s graceful smooth beautiful slow. Guess which slow I’m aiming for.
• I’m strong and healthy inside and out. This has given me beauty and confidence that I see and use everyday of my life. I am able to go outside my comfort zone and accept challenges.
• I see the average 50+ year old woman. My friends, my colleagues, on the street, in the gym. Not for me. I’m not going there.
• I was never big into team sports. I always preferred competing against myself. Measuring progress in terms of time and distance in 3 sports is more meaningful (to me) than winning with a goal in the last 30 seconds.
• I like going to the gym. I see some of my friends there. I make new friends. It’s not like I have to make deals with myself to get there. It’s become part of what I do most days.

It takes longer to be slow. To be slow is to endure, to focus, to concentrate. Slow is about smelling the flowers. Its about the journey, it’s about encouraging others to set out on their own journeys. You just have to be in it. You don’t have to be in it to win it. Slow is looking BEYOND the finish line. Slow is flexibility and balance, in life and in the gym. Slow is music, a conversation, or a poem.

I like slow. I LOVE slow. I am going to live and breathe slow. I am going to blog about being slow. Join me, embrace slow. Slow is beautiful.

p.s. I haven’t totally given up on speed. Even if I am at the back of the pack, maybe I can realistically compete in my age group (maybe I’ll be the only woman in my age group).

The Daily Dose of DOMS

Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness has become a way of life. Every morning when I roll out of bed (and some days rolling really is the only option), I discover which muscles are sore and what movements cause the greatest discomfort. Sometimes it’s merely walking to the bathroom, or sitting on the toilet, or putting gel in m hair or shaking the juice carton (it’s amazing how many activities require muscles). Then there’s walking up the stairs to the train station with my backpack on, or reaching for the pen that has fallen to the floor. Some days are worse than others (like after not doing a strength workout for 2 weeks). Sometimes its concentrated in my upper body and other days in my lower body. Sometimes it eases as the day progresses and sometimes it gets worse. Occasionally I have to decide is this just DOMS or is it something a little more serious that requires a couple of days of rest. This morning was one of those decision days, and I have decided to rest. No gym bag in the car today.

I had Monday off (Presidents Day). It was a somewhat rainy day but unseasonably warm. I went to the track and did my DIY Bootcamp. I had run the day before and I didn’t want to simply run 2 days in a row, so I broke up some really slow laps with other activities. I jumped rope, did lunges, squats, push ups, and jumping jacks. I jumped up onto a low step, and dribbled a soccer ball. I brought an elastic band and did arm/shoulder exercises then tied it around my ankles and got my inner thighs burning good. Before I knew it, I had been working out for over an hour. And just because I still felt strong, I ran one mile, nice and slow. It was the easiest mile I have run in recent memory. I just floated around the track. I contemplated continuing to run, but luckily I thought about my knees. Yesterday morning was one of those days when rolling out of bed was the best option because I had DOMS in muscles I didn’t even know I owned. And my knees were sore. I swam last night because there’s no place like the pool when you are sore like that. And the hot tub! Today my knees are better but still asking for a day off. And all those other muscles are quietly rejoicing as well.

The Crap Cycle

On Tuesday morning I woke up at 5:40 (I teach an 8:00 lab so I get up earlier than usual). By the time I walked 20 feet into the bathroom, my head was pounding and I realized I had a really sore throat. I turned around and got back into bed. I got up again at about 8:00 to call in sick. Then I plopped down on the couch in front of the TV and slept another few hours. I felt like total crap. When I finally felt hungry, I told myself I deserved to eat some delicious processed carbs--- like a bagel! And hot beverages with sugar. I spent the rest of the day on the couch, in my pajamas, a fleece bathrobe and a blanket, trying to get warm. Whenever I felt hungry, I ate crap food because I had no energy to prepare or chew real food. That night I slept like crap. Wednesday was a little better, but still pretty crappy, so I continued to eat crappy food, watch crap TV, and complain about feeling crappy. Thursday morning was a little less crappy than Wednesday, and surprisingly, I had not developed a full-blown head cold. I decided it was time to break the crap cycle, so I packed a lunch of real food and went to work (even though it was my day off, I really needed to get some things done). I left the office a little early and by the time I got home, the crap-o-meter showed a much smaller number, so I cleaned up the kitchen, did a little food prep, and in general decreased the total amount of crappitating. I still slept like crap last night, but being optimistic, I put my gym bag in the car this morning. It’s been 4 consecutive days without working out and I feel like that is part of the crap cycle. I feel so much better about everything when I am working out regularly. Last week I bought Freestyle Made Easy, a swimming instruction DVD. I had an abridged version on videotape, but it broke. One of the non-crappy things I did during this crap cycle was watch the DVD 3 times. And now I need to get in the pool and start putting these skills into practice. Am I addicted? I want to lift! I need to swim! Show me a big red stability ball!

Big Do-Over

I spent 2 days in Albany, to attend a university wide meeting at the University at Albany, my alma mater. The place is almost unrecognizable from the days when I roamed the campus. The academic podium and the 4 quads are still the backbone of the campus, but so many new buildings have been added. And it seems like there are parking lots everywhere there are no buildings. At one point I parked my car near Indian Quad, where I lived as a junior, and walked to the Campus Center. Wearing jeans and a turtleneck, my nylon jacket with the hood up, and my backpack, it really felt like I was caught in a time warp. Oh, there were some big differences, like the fact that I never made that excursion at 8:00 am on a Saturday, and the MacBook in my backpack. But it sure felt plausible, maybe it felt more like a wish. I would love to go to college again, knowing what I know now, and having all of today’s toys. I would probably go in a different direction academically, and probably end up in a different place. It’s fun to think about that, what would you do if you had a big “do-over.” But more than that, in hindsight, it’s about viewing the whole college experience differently. I was so fixated on being a biology major and getting good grades, that I didn’t appreciate the other opportunities and resources that were laid out in front of me. It’s definitely one of ideas that I tried to convey to son #1 when he set of for his freshman year. I’m glad he joined a fraternity and hopefully he will get involved in other groups and activities as well. College is the time to try things on, see what fits, where does it take you. Then hopefully you won’t wish you had one big do-over.

Super Bowl Champions

Today I came to work wearing my Plaxico Burress jersey. Since I have clinic today, I wore a white turtleneck under it and a string of (fake) pearls. I had this big grin on my face all day. And when I wasn’t smiling because I was working, I was smiling on the inside. Because the Giants are Super Bowl Champions. It still feels like a dream, a fairytale come true. And my kids were there. As exciting as it was, it was even more exciting because I gave my kids this experience, this once in a lifetime event (if the Giants are in the Super Bowl again and we get tickets again, they are not getting the tickets!). When we got home from our friend’s house, DH couldn’t even get in bed. Even I had a hard time falling asleep. What a rush. So now it’s time to get back on track, to get back to the mundane……… until pitchers and catchers report!

Eat Pray Love Swim Bike Run

Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert is quite the rage in bookclub circles (I just finished reading it for my bookclub and enjoyed it very much). It has also been on the NY Times Bestseller List for upteen weeks. The book is Gilbert’s account of a year she spent traveling to Italy, India and Indonesia in search of “everything.” After a crippling divorce and a crushing depression, her road to recovery begins in Italy, with the pursuit of pleasure, continues in India with a search for love of self and God, and ends on the island of Bali where she seeks balance.

Swim Bike Run is my version of Eat Pray Love. It is an account of this woman’s search for “everything” across Westchester County.

The Bike is my Italy. It is my source of pleasure as I travel many miles through the natural world and across the seasons. Most of the time I share the experience with friends, new and old. It is easy to make the ride fit my needs (both physical and emotional) on that particular day.

The Swim is my India. Even when I swim with the Masters Swim Team, I am in the pool alone. It’s me against myself. Because I suck so bad at swimming, I am constantly battling my negative thoughts. “Why are you even attempting this? You’re supposed to be in good shape. The coach thinks you’re hopeless, but he can’t tell you that.” And on and on and on, lap after lap after lap. Like Gilbert, I am learning to banish these negative thoughts by telling myself, “You have no idea how strong I am.” You don’t have to excel at something to enjoy it. I am learning to love swimming and rejoicing in my baby steps. Lance understands, “Feed the warrior…..Kill the coward within.”

The Run is my Indonesia. It is a constant balancing act, between my knees and my lungs, between pounding the pavement and finding the rhythm that propels me with little effort. Running is the only time I find myself thinking about just about anything or pretty much nothing. I can turn inward or I can turn on the iPod. I can focus on the rhythms of my body or the rhythms of classic rock.

When in Italy, Gilbert's favorite word in Italian was "attraversiamo," let's cross the street. This becomes a metaphor for her journey as she learned to cross the street, navigate all the traffic and end up on the other side of her life. Swim Bike Run, attraversiamo, let's cross the street and find out where an athletic life can take you.

It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times

As I prepare to say goodbye to 2007, I pause to reflect on all the wonderful people and love I experience everyday. It was the best of times and the worst of times, but that's what an ordinary life is. The ups and downs, the ins and outs, moments of great happiness and times of loss and grief. My mother-in-law's illness and death in September was the darkness that infiltrated much of the year. But I was able to take comfort from the relationship we had forged over 22 years. How lucky I am to have had her in my life! And everyday I wake up with her son beside me. We've been married for 22 years. We have two sons who are becoming young men faster than I can believe. We both have jobs, a beautiful home, and friends and family around us. We have financial security and good health. We share the same values and attitude about how to live our lives. Life is good. Can it be better? Probably. Will we try to make it better? Absolutely! I'm looking forward to 2008. Bring. It. On.

The Money Pit

DH and I have noticed a crack in the ceiling in the kitchen. It has been slowly getting worse. There is a bathroom, more specifically a bathtub directly above the crack, so we have tried ignoring the crack to see if it would miraculously disappear. Yesterday we had another plumbing problem so DH decided it was time to overcome active denial and consent to exploratory surgery on the ceiling. Ian, the plumber is a very friendly man who obviously enjoys the challenge of finding the source of a leak, with zest and devotion akin to Livingstone searching for the source of the Nile. Armed with equal amounts of passion and skill, Ian wielded a sheetrock knife and a flashlight and began his quest. His search turned up several potential problems but unconvinced that he had found the real problem, he followed the trail of clues up to the attic (forensic plumbing). When he poured water into a pipe draining the condensing tray of the air conditioning unit and the water poured out of the ceiling in the kitchen, he was ecstatic! I was screaming “stop” stop” and he was yelling “wow! this is great!”

While searching for the source of the Nile in our attic, Ian discovered another river. The plywood around the chimney is soaked. This is bad, this is a big bad river because it may mean we need a new roof. Or new siding. Or both. So DH and I will both put on our lifejackets as we start to navigate this new big bad river.

In the meantime, we are considering cutting additional holes into the ceiling in various locations in our center hall colonial home, and then covering them with plexiglass instead of boring old sheetrock. Then we could charge admission, to view the see-through house. Haven’t you ever wondered what the guts of your home look like, its digestive, circulatory, respiratory and nervous systems? Want to see all the things that can go wrong in a house? Yes, we can provide a live view into the mouth (actually the ceiling) of the Money Pit.

Waitin for the Nor'easter

For the last few days we've been hearing about the Big Storm supposed to blow in here today/tonight/tomorrow. When will it start? How close will the storm come? Snow or rain or a wintry mix? So while waiting, today was a perfect day to go cross country skiing. A snow storm on Thursday brought about 6-8 inches of snow, which was just enough snow for some good skiing. It was actually a really nice day and I enjoyed the a workout in the great outdoors. Much better than spending time on a treadmill. It did bother my toe a bit, but not enough to make me quit. There's a little cafe at the Winter Park, and after skiing, we all had hot chocolate and snacks. Life is good. Now we can hang at home and see what the Nor'easter brings.

Hanging Around the House

On Thanksgiving Day, we spent the day at my brother and SIL's house. Since they live between here and son #1's college, son #1 went to their house on Wednesday evening. That worked out well. My brother is very into digital photography and son #1 just bought himself a digital SLR, so they went out taking pictures on Thursday morning . After enjoying a spectacular Thanksgiving dinner, we all played Dance Dance Revolution and other games on the Wii. That was hilarious. I improved, but I am not very good at DDR. But I can see how some kids get addicted to it! My nieces were planning on going to bed early so they could get up before the crack of dawn for....... BLACK FRIDAY. I'm sure they were in the mall by 6 am. I am working hard at avoiding any roads that go anywhere near a major shopping destination. The truth is I really need to buy some clothes, but I can't stand the idea of fighting those crowds. Its gonna have to wait.

I am taking advantage of not shopping to take care of things around the house, and of course, spend some time at the gym. On Thursday morning DH and I did the "Pilgrim Pedal." It is a tradition at our gym-- a special 90 minute spin class on Thanksgiving morning. There is a guest instructor..... wow, talk about eye candy at the front of the spinning studio. The number of women taking spin classes would probably skyrocket if he was teaching classes on a regular basis. At the end of the class, we collected our commemorative pilgrim pedal bling-- just what we need around here-- 2 more T-shirts and water bottles! I've been using my new heart rate monitor that calculates calories burned, based on your age, HR, weight. So I sat down at the Thanksgiving table with a 570 calorie deficit! That's no excuse for eating like a pig, but I guess it's better than not having those calories in the bank.

So over the weekend, I guess I will do the usual weekend thing-- cook, laundry, gym, football. I also need to clean out my clothes closet and clean up my desk-- both things I have been avoiding. I'm also trying to contemplate "where do I want to go from here." And I'm thinking about a triathlon. More on this in future posts over the next few weeks, but if I am serious, then I need to seriously considert taking some swimming lessons and a new session is starting the week of December 3. I may take them anyway, because fitness swimming would be a wonderful activity to add to my fit life, even if I never do a triathlon. Lots to think about.... do I even have a bathing suit for the gym?

Paintball

My gym has a hiking club which has expanded in scope-- it is now an "Outdoor Fitness Club." In addition to hiking, we have gone kayaking and today was the first Paintball Event! What an experience! Here are my observations and experiences from my first day of paintball.

1. It is not cheap, but $50 did pay for a whole day of entertainment.
2. Getting hit with a paintball hurts. In fact, I have one bruise on my calf (from friendly fire).
3. If you're not going to go for it, it's not as much fun. Make sure you purchase plenty of paintballs AND rent a camouflage jumpsuit.
4. It's a man's game. There are some women, but not many.
   
5. Fat people do not play paintball.
   
6. Testosterone definitely fuels more aggressive play-- these guys were hurling paintball hand grenades into enemy fortifications.
7. You play several squirmishes, each one on a different battlefield. I enjoyed this part of it the most, having to develop different strategies to "stay alive" on different terrain.
8. Although there were some attempts to develop a unified plan, it's mostly small "cells" heading in different directions and trying to avoid getting ambushed (e.g. almost but not quite organized chaos).
   
9. I am a fairly defensive paintballer. I ran for cover, tried to find enemy locations and waited for them to expose themselves. With all the testosterone-driven men trying to be paintball heroes, this was a good strategy. I conserved ammo and had a few good "kills."
   
10. Safety is taken VERY SERIOUSLY (as it should be). Helmets/goggles are required and if you as much as touch them while on the playing field, the refs yell at you immediately.
    
11. I don't know if this really qualified as "outdoor fitness," but it definitely go my heart pounding!
    
12. I would definitely do this again. Not next weekend, but definitely again.

Belated 50th Birthday Present

When you turn 50, you get a very special gift from your physician-- an order for a colonoscopy. I have been putting off receiving this very special gift for over a year. I finally took care of it. Let me just say that the procedure itself is nothing 'cause they put you to sleep. The prep for it, on the other hand, is horrendous. You know how people say you quickly forget the pain of childbirth and then "sign up" for another one? Well, the same is not true of colonoscopy. I won't forget the misery of colonoscopy prep, and I won't be signing up for another one any time soon. Luckily, the gastroenterologist told me I have a lovely colon, and gave me a 5 year pass.

While we're on the topic of anaesthesia, ever wonder what the doctors talk about when they put you under? I had an interesting experience when I had a C-section. I had a spinal, so I was awake, but the anaesthesiologist was talking to the other docs like I wasn't even there. He talked about what a bitch his wife was because she wouldn't let him go hunting and spent too much of his money. My doctor finally told him to quit it. Maybe it wouldn't have been any different if I had general anaesthesia because this doctor had a personality disorder, but it left me wondering whatr these docs talk about it (Maybe I'm just paranoid).

Focus

The last few weeks have been rough. A few days after my MIL's funeral, we had a toilet back-up in the house and cause a nasty little flood. That turned out to be a broken pipe between the house and the septic fields (read between the lines: big $). Once that was fixed, I went out of town for a meeting for a few days. It was actually a relief to get away from home for a bit. There were fewer events or people around me that had the potential to trigger an overwhelming feeling of sadness. And working showers and toilets 24/7.

So now I am trying to get myself focused on being ordinary, getting back into our routines. Yesterday I went down to the track and ran 4 miles. In the late afternoon I made a big pot of minestrone soup. I watched baseball and football games. I got some laundry done. Yeah, pretty ordinary. The last few weeks have been an excuse for eating whatever came my way, mostly cookies and bagels. Time to get my nutrition back in synch with what my body needs (and it ain't cookies and bagels). So this week I plan to continue getting back on track, making the time to workout, focusing on ordinary......except for the colonoscopy I have scheduled for Friday!